Last Friday when my colleague IM-ed me and told me he had something for me, I assumed that he had finally figured out a solution to the work-related problem that has been plaguing me for months. I was perplexed when he showed up at my desk with a box of Godiva chocolates instead and told me that it was to thank me for all the sweets I’ve treated you to (for the record, I distribute my sweets equally amongst my peers). I was glad I was too busy on the phone for further potentially awkward conversation beyond a simple thanks.
Afterward, I spent a good hour or so analyzing what the chocolates could mean with my girl friends. I even tried very discretely to ask my guy friend what it generally means when a guy gives a girl chocolates. Is it just a nice, thank you gesture as he said? Or does it mean more? My girl friends squeled and gave me knowing looks, while my guy friend told me that he generally doesn’t give a female friend chocolates in case they “got the wrong idea.” In the end, I decided to stop thinking about it and take it at face value, since that is what I want to believe. See, I was just complaining about him the other day to my friends, about how he acts like a whiny little kid when he is clearly beyond the age for it. I know that he is probably used to being coddled, being the only boy in an Asian family of many sisters, but in the real world, people really don’t care (or want to know) if he has a mouth sore or not and how he takes care of it. I’m his friend, not his mom.
But then I was talking to a friend in Hong Kong and she mentioned that this weekend was White Day i.e. the Japanaese/South Korean/Taiwanese version of Valentines day. I thought it was strange that he’d chosen white chocolates since they’re generally not anyone’s first choice and I’ve never expressed a preference for them (in fact, they’re not my thing). I thought maybe they were on sale. But now everything makes sense.
“Traditionally, popular White Day gifts are cookies, jewellery, white chocolate, and marshmallows”
The skinny jeans, the man bag and the swag in his walk (if I didn’t know any better, I’d have thought he was gay)- all signs that he worship the Japanese culture. No wonder he also celebrates the Japanese Valentine’s day! But while I am very flattered to be the recipient of his Godiva chocolates (it is a very sweet gesture of very good taste), I’d frankly really rather have a solution to the work-related problem that has been plaguing me for months instead as a thanks. If only my cute Korean colleague had given me white chocolates….
A word of advice to other guys who wants to give a girl chocolates on White day but doesn’t live in Japan, S Korea or Taiwan- other girls (who are not of the three origins either) may not be as astute as I and be confused by this random gesture.
Tea with BG 
novice9 said:
But unless you gave him the sweets specifically on Valentine’s, isn’t he replicating the practice incorrectly? On Wikipedia, it mentions that the White Day gifts are to reciprocate earlier gifts given on Valentine’s. Still, it does seem to fit well.
Joy said:
Did u give him chocolate on Valentine’s day? If so, it means he’s misunderstanding u that u have also have a crash on him.
XOXO said:
Actually, his White Day gift is a reciprocal gesture. White Day is the conventional day guys respond to girls after girls gave them chocolate on Valentine’s Day. He probably thinks you have a crush on him because he received chocolate on Valentine’s Day. Don’t lead people on by bringing everyone chocolate.
Barneys Girl said:
Just to clarify, I love to bake, but I live alone. So I constantly bring back sweet baked goods to the office for my friends and peers(to distribute the fat:P). For Vday, I brought back a big box of double choc chips and shared them with everyone on my lunch table, which he happens to be part of. But I do this all the time whenever I feel like baking…..
walkinginheels said:
I just have to say:
aaaaaw, at least (amongst the confusion) he liked you enough to give you chocolates back.
It’s always nice to feel liked even when it’s not reciprocated.
walkinginheels said:
on second thoughts, maybe he was expressing social obligation….soooo not sweet or “aww”-worthy.
MonsteRawr said:
I’d be curious to know how he took your lack of response. I always enjoy a good ego crushing. As for the chocolates…awkward or not, I never turn down free Godiva. Never.
Knikki said:
Awwwwww. I’m not sure what to do about his incesant whining but I think it’s a sign of being spoiled (like you said) and also a sign that he thinks that is what girls want to hear… You know in movies when a guy comes in and he’s walking on crutches and all the girls run over to help him??? Maybe it’s like that win except minus the huge injury.
nini said:
Maybe he secretly likes you but is too afraid of rejection to tell you, so he said the chocolate was for all those times you treated him and other people treats.
As for the whining, maybe his mouth just happens to move whenever he thinks.